She asked me where I’d like to meet. I said Monaco. We met at a race. We went to the casino. We played blackjack and roulette. We had many drinks. We went dancing. We rented sports cars and drove them on the strip.
She told me she had a house there. She took me to her house. It had a secret garage entrance. It was right around the turn before you turn right and then go down the windy path to the water. It has a nice view of the ocean, or should I say the sea. It’s a cool house. She said the queen of Monaco gave it to her as a present for singing at her daughter’s wedding. I was impressed.
There were about 20 garage spots for cars there. I told her I wouldn’t mind living in Monaco. It would be a fun place to settle down. I’m sure the schools are good, I told her. That’s really the only thing that matters to me in a place, how good the schools are. I grew up in a place that was kind of racist, but the schools were good. I mean, I learned math, physics, science, everything that I needed to become a doctor and invent time travel. I hoped Monaco had as good of schools as Westchester, Ohio. That’s all I could tell her.
She somehow made it into my pictures of Ferrari Dino 6 and Lamborghini Diablo job, both of which are two of my porno movies that I’ve planned to make in the future. I make regular movies, I make sci-fi movies, I make sci-fact movies, I make porno movies. I’m a movie director. I don’t know why you think I work for the CIA. These are all just scripts I’m writing for CIA movies. Don’t you know CIA controls Hollywood? I figured I might as well appeal directly to the boss of Hollywood, the CIA, with my CIA time travel movies.
You know how I used the CIA to kill all the Nazi time travelers and kill all the Stalin time travelers and kill all the alien time travelers and kill any time traveler except for me and my wife who live in Monaco, Manchester, Ohio, and Miami, Florida, and Chicago, Illinois. We don’t really go to that many places. We just needed a nice triangle and then we put Cincinnati in the middle. It kind of makes like a Star Trek symbol if you look at it on a map. Yeah.
The three points of the triangle are Chicago, Miami, and Monaco, and the center point is Cincinnati, Ohio. That’s the home of space travel. It’s called New Miami 2. New Miami 1 is just Cincinnati, Chicago, and Miami. New Miami 2 includes Monaco.
We can thank Bad Bunny for that Monaco track that really kind of set it off for me. That’s my favorite Bad Bunny song. You know, me and Bad Bunny, we go way back. He’ll tell you someday where he comes from. You know, there’s a world where there’s only bunnies. Bunnies and carrots and flowers. One day one of those bad bunnies became a human. And that bad bunny sang this song, I Like It, with Cardi B. And then, you know, the rest is history.
When Bad Bunny did the Super Bowl, that was something else. Curb stomping through all the jungles of Central and South America in one clip. What a great performance. What an excellent performance. And he didn’t even play Monaco. I guess you’re supposed to play Monaco while you’re watching the clip. That’s probably what I’ll do. That’ll just be my little gifty gift. My little gifty gift to the world. Bad Bunny Super Bowl Monaco remix.
